Dear Tom,
For 25 years we have loved and laughed, struggled and questioned, grown together and grown individually. For 25 years we have tried to respect and honor each other, and parented four amazing human beings. For 25 years you have made me feel like the most important person in your world, you have taught me that I deserve to be treated like a queen and you have loved me unfailingly. Thank you.
Here are some moments that soften my heart, fill me with joy and renew my love for you; a snapshot from each year of our marriage.
- Nov 16, 1988 – Nov 15, 1989: Our formal wedding day in June, surrounded by family and friends. We were so relaxed because we knew we had already committed to each other and we enjoyed the day enormously. And a move to Virginia.
- –Nov 15, 90: The arrival of our gorgeous little Buddha baby, Conor, who knew you could love someone so fiercely having just met them? Another move to North Carolina…we’re getting good at this!
- -Nov 15, 91: Another joyous arrival. This time Ashley blew into our lives full of passion and spirit; she made us a family then and continues to do so today.
- -Nov 15, 92: My life is perfect; I have 2 wonderful little ones, a husband I adore and we live in a neighborhood surrounded by new friends.
- -Nov 15, 93: Our first ‘major’ move together (2500 miles) with kidlets, we stopped every 10 miles for Ashley to “go pee now”. We still use the expression!
- -Nov 15, 94: Our little firecracker arrived 4th of July and has added a level of contentment and peace ever since. Every family deserves a Dani.
- -Nov 15, 95: Nana and Uncle Bren both visited and with each we went to the Grand Canyon, both truly breath-taking experiences, our first real family vacations.
- -Nov 15, 96: Another major move (across the Atlantic, to Dublin and Saudi Arabia) and a year apart. I missed you so much and I learned to rely on (and even ask) others to help me (a good lesson!)
- -Nov 15, 97: We completed our family when Brendan arrived. I never knew we were missing something till B arrived to fill the gap and became the baby of the family. Yet another move.
- -Nov 15, 98: After another move, we bought our first home and finally felt like adults!
- -Nov 15, 99: A heart-breaking loss when Joe left us. You held me tight as I learned to cherish the memories and the happiness I had received from having Joe as a dear friend.
- -Nov 15, 00: Another year when you are gone more than you are home. We missed you and relished the family time we had when you were there. Lots of short vacations and loads of memories; Busch Gardens and Disney became our backyards!
- -Nov 15, 01: All our plans changed (the world changed) and we learned that, sometimes, not getting what you want works in your favor. A quick move to Utah was fun and a great experience.
- -Nov 15, 02: Returning to Dublin was challenging for us all; a time of incredible personal growth and our roughest year as a couple.
- -Nov 15, 03: The 6 months following Mum’s death brought more pain and struggle and, like steel forged by harsh fire, we emerge stronger for holding hands in the dark times.
- -Nov 15, 04: Yet another trans-Atlantic move and this time we learn the power of letting go and allowing the Universe to direct us. A lesson we have never forgotten.
- -Nov 15, 05: Conor teaches us that, though a teen may deviate from the path for a while, chances are his true nature will shine through and direct his actions.
- -Nov 15, 06: Our first family skiing season and we have wonderful weekends together, playing, learning, having fun. A good reminder to spend lots of time together laughing and loving.
- -Nov 15, 07: Yet another goodbye but this time we are so grateful to have spent the last 2-3 years with your Dad; the time together has been filled with love and laughter and that eases the pain.
- -Nov 15, 08: Our first high school graduation; where did the time go? We begin to realize how precious the memories we have will be when the nest is empty.
- -Nov 15, 09: Our second high school graduation. We are given an opportunity to learn a whole new way of looking at life, work and finances and this changes the trajectory of our lives forever.
- -Nov 15, 10: The kids are such great teachers! Ashley helps us learn that happiness is a much more important element in life than we had realized as she heads off into the world to make her mark.
- -Nov 15, 11: Another kid lesson – Brendan teaches us that we can all fall down, make a lousy choice and it can be a slow healing process, but we can, and do, heal. We moved again!
- -Nov 15, 12: And another one… Dani teaches us that when you want something and are willing to put your heart and soul into it, you succeed. Another HS graduation. And another move (seriously, this has to stop!).
- -Nov 15, 13: When I suggested the radical overhaul of our lives, it took you 2 breaths to nod your head and say, What the hell, let’s do it together. And off we drove, the three of us on a grand adventure.
And now, as we look forward to the next 25 years, in answer your question…Will you marry me again? I say What the hell, let’s do it together.
Love you Tom xoxoxo
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